why am I so bored?
Is it because it’s cold out?
Is it because I’m tired?
Is it because I’m still dealing with withdrawals of having been a mommy to Drea?
Is it because I was sick for 3 weeks?
Is it because I got in a restless funk from lack of exercise due to being too sick to workout and now I can’t get back to the gym?
I have ZERO motivation to do anything.
I don’t feel like I’ve been getting out much, but I also don’t feel like I’ve been cooped up in my house. It’s a strange feeling but I feel rather apathetic.
I know what my problem might be–I have no problems! I’m sitting here typing on my computer wondering why I’m introverted, withdrawn or apathetic when the reality is–NOTHING IS WRONG. Maybe it’s just that I was sick and tired. Mabye I just needed some rest. I’m not cooped up indoors and I do go out. My perspective is askew and I think things are tiresome or boring because I HAVE NO DRAMA in my life. No bad relationships, no long distance boy-with-kid drama, no stress at work (in fact, I’m back to my work-loving long hours and workaholic ways!)… I’m not hanging out with a mad number of people or having wild adventures so is THAT why I am strange and feeling like a recluse?
Since childhood, I’ve been conditioned to exist in chaos. Horribly abusive father, a house with 9 people sharing 2 bathrooms and fighting over the remote (god, imagine if we had to fight over a computer–only me and my dos programming bro would fight over that)… what else? my family was steeped in chaos and instability. after the divorce my mom lived off of 200 dollars month to month… i figured that out one day while overlooking (and finally understanding) her checkbook balance. After that day, I never asked for dance lessons.
Anywho, for the longest time I surrounded myself with drama–hence my overdoing it with drinking, the fag-haging, and the you-name-it-addictions.
I take on more than I can handle and I rise to the challenge and drama. For once I can concentrate on myself and it is strange to have calm and quiet. I’ll see if I can enjoy and sustain it… eeks! sooo weird.
No more chaos:
January 27th, 2007 at 2:23 am
jus seen u on the home page but damn that shitz intense. i know what u mean (about life), itz jus crazy that u spoke the words that belonged to me for so long…my son’s name is Caius (KY-US), its hell not to know my would-be child. If you’ve lost a child, believe me that ur not alone in the pain. stay strong
January 27th, 2007 at 10:54 am
What a refreshing blog. Thank you for your honesty. I grew up with a similar background (divorce, mom had little to spend), and I’m used to drama, drama, drama. But the cold does make me a little lethargic.
January 27th, 2007 at 1:34 pm
probably becoz ur still sufferin’ from baby blues or postpartum depression thats why everythin seems to be so wrong when actually its not.
January 27th, 2007 at 8:51 pm
dats great!!!!!
January 28th, 2007 at 4:34 am
like you i’m bored for a month i am staying here in KSA from my home town philippines. i thought i have a job when i arrive there. but my paper is not yet finished for me to work here.. i love helping my family, giving my sister her allowance in school paying her tuition fees. but now i am totally bored because here. you know i cannot go out on my own.do such thing i’ve been doing before.. what i can do here now is watch TFC(the filipino Channel) look for the dogs of my auntie, wash the clothes and clean the house which is so typical.. i want to work so that i can earn money.. and after that go back to the philippines put up my own business and to be with my family. i hope they finished my papers so that i can work soon.. i think thats the best way to forget my boredom and being homesick.. you know someday i want to have a baby and i want to take care it on my own together with my mahal.. have agreat day reading this sentiment of mine. samile
January 28th, 2007 at 9:02 am
kaya pala naubos ang pintura ko eh.
January 28th, 2007 at 11:09 am
so transparent with your feelings and i like your honesty…you must learn to admit on your mistakes because it would make you realize and learn from your misleads. but mind you that nothing of any material matter could make a person’s life happy…as for me, i may lay down and bleed awhile, but i shall rise and fight again!
January 28th, 2007 at 6:42 pm
I am holidaying in Viet Nam/HCM City until 21st Feb. then back to Melbourne as Uni Begins. Anyone out there happens to be from Melbourne at this time I would like to say hello to and perhapes meet up for a few drinks and talk Australian of which I deadly missed!
January 28th, 2007 at 7:22 pm
Ken, is this some kind of singles bulletin board?
January 29th, 2007 at 12:00 am
hi friend add me up mina_888@yahoo.com
January 29th, 2007 at 4:17 am
hey this is my id abrar_lee@yahoo.com… add me
January 29th, 2007 at 8:51 am
aloha from hawaii, kaya mo yan, add me up…rene_gedaria@hotmail.com
January 30th, 2007 at 1:14 am
hi.its me, gie..i want to add you as one of my friends.can you add me too?i i really appreciate your emotion and the way you explore your feelings.such a cool revelation and i like you as being so transparent for what having emotion you have right now. and i was so impressed.i wish i could do the same revelation just like what you did.. im sure yoo’re now ok after you write this feelings..from now on i treated you as one of my dearest friend even though you dont know me yet..but as ive read your letter maybe i knew half of you..thank you for sharing your emotions and post it to friendster blogs because somehow you touched life of others.like me..hope we’re friends now
January 30th, 2007 at 2:01 am
Hey there… what you wrote rather seemed comical to me than anything.. though it does say about some bad things that you’ve gone through.. but i must appreciate the way you write things… they’re just great… there could be a humor write inside you.. whihc you must bring into existence…
good luck…
January 30th, 2007 at 3:22 am
i have no comment.
January 30th, 2007 at 7:19 am
whooaah..
your great gurl!
i like the way u deliver it so good..
stay safe..
shedrick_15@yahoo.com
January 30th, 2007 at 2:40 pm
if ur bored do some masturebathing huhuhuhu
January 30th, 2007 at 4:01 pm
Sometimes it happened to me to everyone that means you are not alone.
Demi Diego, UK
January 30th, 2007 at 7:26 pm
hello just a lil boring not at all, anyways need a friend?im here.
February 1st, 2007 at 1:35 am
That’s a great revelation, I am i wishing i could be having strong feelings and great encouragement to do the same as what you did. Me too, has something to reveal which is very dificult to do. I am now in Riyadh KSA, working as a travel consultant. I hope someday i will do the same. have a great day. SMILE
February 1st, 2007 at 5:55 am
well if you are bored this is what you do…. there are 2 things that you nedd to keep in mind that sex is not the best solution and second fucking yourself will not work.
February 1st, 2007 at 7:15 am
I guess I’m going to go with the default.
February 1st, 2007 at 8:21 am
coz frendser suck.., myspace rule.., heghe
February 2nd, 2007 at 12:16 am
thats a part of growing up…
February 2nd, 2007 at 5:20 am
everybody feels what u feel but in different ways and case.but one thing is for sure that u r human!!!!whatever the purpose of ur boredom i knew u can cope with it.and if u feel ur so down and u nid a shoulder to cry on or someone to share it remember that we are here to cheer u up!!!and most of all only HE can ease your sorrow and just put ur tust in HIM ok!
February 2nd, 2007 at 6:05 am
You gave me an idea! At the moment, i feel the same way as u feel…i feel so bored and getting tired of this routinary life…i am creating my own problem because i really don’t have a problem!!! Life goes on….maybe we just have to think positively and look forward to the next day with a smile….at least u have a baby to make ur day great….Cheer to us!
February 2nd, 2007 at 6:49 pm
waaaaaaaaaaaaa its to long guysss..
February 2nd, 2007 at 10:14 pm
alhyn_arjay05@yahoo.com ..
-just add me on your friendster so that i can easily help you..
alhyn_angel05@yahoo.com
-you can send some e-mail messages for me..
t.c alwayz..GodBless
-everything will be fine..
February 3rd, 2007 at 8:35 pm
i can sooooo relate with you…i’ve been on the same “state” for quite some time now….just bored…bored….BORED!!!also about having “zero” motivation to do anything,too!it’s really driving me nuts….asking myself why…what’s the reason!???i have 3 kids (16,14 and 9) who practically behave well most of the time….a loving and very patient husband….but maybe,i just miss the drama!guess i’m bored with “stillness”……
btw,we also have the same family background….only on my part,the mother is the horribly abusive one and when they got separated (since no divorce in the Phils.),me and my siblings had to live with her….aaaargh!(coz i’m the eldest of 6).but it’s been ages and i already got over it (still hate her though).
anyhow,i already came with the conclusion that maybe my problem is that bec. “i have no problem” even before i saw your “piece”….it didn’t make sense then,but it is now!thank’s for sharing……tc!
February 4th, 2007 at 1:18 am
everyone has its own boredness n problem!be strong!god knows u can handle it.feel d same way at times.just pray n pray.
February 4th, 2007 at 1:58 am
Stay with ur boredness…
February 4th, 2007 at 5:18 am
your cute………..
February 4th, 2007 at 9:34 am
Congratulations… try not to create any chaos, peace is rare. Restless? Cook a wonderful dinner. Blog, get in the tub, tube, whatever. Just don’t create chaos. You’re not alone.
February 4th, 2007 at 9:36 am
i like you to become my friend……
February 4th, 2007 at 10:32 am
thanks Jeannie
February 4th, 2007 at 10:34 am
haha.. a couple of months ago i had almost exactly the same problems as yours… no problems, no drama, and bored to death. and I would ask myself “what the f%$CK I’m doing here?” But now that I’m so freakin busy I find those boring days like a trip to hawaii.
February 4th, 2007 at 11:32 am
i also get bored sometimes….doing the same thing over and over again but then when i see and count my blessings i realize im more blessed and should have nothing to complain about coz others have more tragic life than us… be strong and always smile
February 4th, 2007 at 3:53 pm
You are bored because you are your bored self. Don´t judge it or ask why it is what it is. Then you are only running away from it. Learn to enjoy your boredom. Be creative with your boredom.
February 4th, 2007 at 4:55 pm
i do get the same feeling as you sometimes…when there’s nothing really wrong but at the same time, you are being bored…maybe we are just looking for an adventure, a change, because we are too tired of the same pattern of life…hey cheer up! you are not alone…think positive all the time!
February 4th, 2007 at 6:32 pm
Just think about ur life, and you’ll see how beautiful it is.
February 4th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
I’m not sure if this applies to you but living in this world can sometimes feel like you are trapped in a house of mirrors. There is so much media hipe about the right way to live that the TRUE way for you can get lost. It could be right in front of you but you can’t see it. We are lost without a direction that we are passionate about. I recently was given a book called the “SECRET” which gave me back the vision to create my TRUE direction. I’m not trying to sell you anything. This has helped get back my selfesteem and the power over myself and therfore the power over my environment. Try it.
February 4th, 2007 at 8:28 pm
Boredom!!! I got the feeling that there’s this emptiness in your heart that is why you are bored. Did you ever try soul searching? You will find that there is an empty space in your heart that no one else can fill it. Only Jesus!
February 4th, 2007 at 8:33 pm
Boredom!!! I got the feeling that there’s this emptiness in your heart that is why you are bored. Did you ever try soul searching? You will find that there is an empty space in your heart that no one else can fill it. Only Jesus!He can give you the motivation to move on and with Him, life is never boring!!!
February 4th, 2007 at 9:20 pm
hoLLa buenos dias
February 4th, 2007 at 10:03 pm
Ehhh… I experienced the exact same thing when I got fuckin’ mono. uggh I know. Nice entry, though. I thought this would be another emo trip that I’m gonna laugh on, but I kinda had a great time reading this (everything’s fun after the Colts won. ;[)
xox,
ramon
February 4th, 2007 at 10:35 pm
It is the nature of this life that people will suffer from worries and stress, because this world is the place of disease, hardship and suffering. Hence among the things that distinguish Pardiese from this world is the fact that there is no worry or stress there: “No sense of fatigue shall touch them, nor shall they (ever) be asked to leave” [Al-Hijr 15:48] Nothing upsets the people of Paradise, not even the slightest word: “No laghw (dirty, false, evil vain talk) will they hear therein, nor any sinful speech (like backbitting, etc.), but only the saying of Salaam! Salaam! (greetings with peace).” [al-Waaqia'ah 56:25-26].
It is also the nature of this life that people have to put up with suffering and hardship for various reasons, as is indicated in the Qur’aan: “Verily, We have created man in toil.” [al-Balad 90:4]. So people feel regret for what has happened in the past, anxious about what may happen in the future, and worried abuot what is going on in the present.
The things that cross our minds and make us feel distressed are things in the past that have caused grief, things in the future that we are worring about, and things in the present which concerns us.
People react differently to stress and worries, depending on how many things are concerning them, whether they have faith in their hearts or are refellious and sinful. We may describe people’s hearts as being of two types; either the heart is the throne of Allah, filled with light, life, happiness, joy and all the treasures of goodness; or it is the throne of Shaytaan wherein is distress, darkness, death, grief, worry and anxiety.
People’s worries and concerns will also differ, according to the differences in their motivations, circumstances and individual responsibilities.
One type of worry or concern is that which may be described as worthwhile worries that are a good sign, such as the concern of the Muslim leader about the problems of the people under his care.
February 5th, 2007 at 3:21 am
As per my angle you have expresed nicly.
I like to invite you to be a good friend tome
February 5th, 2007 at 3:53 am
it’s called post-partum syndrome. yet yourself a shrink.
February 5th, 2007 at 4:40 am
yoooooooo whts pumoing dont get bored check out da music snoop dogg snd akon “i wana love u” i am sure when u hear this song u will never 4ever feel bored take care
February 5th, 2007 at 6:42 am
i loveyou
February 5th, 2007 at 7:03 am
as being a professional, i’ll suggest u that u should consult me. cuz i’m the psychologist.
February 5th, 2007 at 11:25 am
cant we friends in ym pls’im kenneth romano this my ym kent8769@yahoo.com see u soon’ thnks’
February 5th, 2007 at 6:49 pm
I’ve got your drama now, I collect it.
February 5th, 2007 at 6:51 pm
Cheer up!!Be thankful bein’ bored sometimes..That’s part of life.Just think of; behind the clouds,the sun is still shining.Go on,when life isn’t worthy,we don’t seem like bein’ worthy to live at all.
February 6th, 2007 at 12:42 am
hmmm.. life is full of s**t.. we all know that.. but it’s still beautiful… c”,) just enjoy.. come what may… and bring it on!!! anyway, we all go to the same direction… nobody will escape that… so, me? worry? naah….
February 6th, 2007 at 9:10 am
welcome every body
February 6th, 2007 at 11:06 am
wow u gotta start doing things
February 6th, 2007 at 11:46 am
it is good but i cold do better
February 6th, 2007 at 6:14 pm
same life here..
add me plz..
smart_jay03@yahoo.com
thank you.
February 6th, 2007 at 7:17 pm
I have often heard that people who are bored are just simply boring people. Don’t know if it’s true, but something to think about
February 7th, 2007 at 1:53 am
well, it happens.dwell on it for a time…lick ur wounds, cry, scream.but don’t forget to get back to ur real world. then, have some happy goals to try on!in that way, u will be living a life again. hopefully in its real sense…LIVE.
February 7th, 2007 at 12:19 pm
ok
February 7th, 2007 at 1:08 pm
hi! i guess we r pretty much alike. i get bored pretty easy too. not that i’m bored but i think it is because i missed my life before kids. I love my kids so much but my point is i’m pretty much stuck with them. this s d life that i choosed and i had a hard time adjusting from being free to being a mom. and i love being a mom but sometimes i think we need a break..somehow?..u take care..
February 7th, 2007 at 5:11 pm
why i cannt fine good person and why i m always been good to other if other always hurt me and how do i do that to other if other doing to me bad but its okey thes is part of the life since i b4 loving some one very much i lost everything bcoz of her but she hurt me and now i m thinking to fine real person who well loving me for ever but no no no now i m too scard maybe again i hurt in love so then maybe i lost my life coz i m in love been seroius and other playing game so i wont well love some one but then i m thinking then why u still in life in world if u been out with love try u well fine some one and everyday thes is i m thinking well see who next and who well hurt me i m ready .and my life if a black sonce i lost love and family i m always wearing black clothes and in net if see me some one in the cam and in person then they ask me why u always in black then i m telling to them bcoz my life was dark and black and its truth if u lost everything then how do u well feels i think some one going to hell but loot i m still in life and i m try to do good and make every one happy but u know the life is over really how do i forget the love sweet time how do i forget everything but its okey now i forget it allready and i m okey but still half thinking abut everything heart still hurt and mind not okey thes is hard to trust some one and i m cuonting my life lost day when its well be over thes is the mr khan storey waseem khan
February 7th, 2007 at 5:24 pm
hey friend donnt be bored bcoz thes is the part of life and we have to still wtrong we have to make a life every one not happy in world but then we donnt have a choice but u know thes is well be okey i think u need to fine some one who well loving u but ohh my god right now not true love and person yeah but one thing have what ? thes is u can fine some one who well loving u then u well be fine and thats why u feels bored bcoz u been alon but anyway i m fine i did not feel bored i can play with p c and watch movie and play with out said childs then affter that bcome night i cannt wait to go to sleepy then i was sleepy and i have one cat she always take a shit for my bed yake she shit smell to bad some time i m thinking to hang on her like sadam but then i m thinking no bcoz poor sadam was hang on but nothing change in iraq every day people daying then i m thinking what well be thinking bush bcoz bush very good looking man hes have a good face good eyes hair and then i m thinking mr bush when u well catch osama i think he scard with osama bcoz he catch like sadam person and hang on him why he not catching osama he have too thes is what make me thinking i m thinking bush and osama have a one plan they are friend if they are not friend then why he lose osma untill now abut that how much people dying everyday so we have to tell to bush catch him very soon we cannt wait to finish the big problem bcoz we got a life we donnt like to died we love life i love my life its is black life but i life friend if u think abut worlds then u well wont geting bored ok try to be happy life is very short …..thes is mr waseem khan ok i m doctor abut bored people i can give u alots of storey hehhehehe smile now
February 7th, 2007 at 5:30 pm
wow!!! im not alone… thanks for posting this blog.. im sure youve touched people as youve hit bulls eye in my mind and in my heart.. need a friend??? im here.. lets share lifes drama…youre not alone
February 7th, 2007 at 11:10 pm
I think it is all becoz of you. You bore yourself. You hide yourself away. If you wanna have some thrill in your life, get out of your shell and face the music outside. And if you really can’t take the world outside then go back and live your boring life again and never complain anymore.
February 8th, 2007 at 2:26 am
hey there.. same as me … its like Freaking suck!
how do you enjoy your boredom?
February 8th, 2007 at 9:03 am
hello friend
how are you ? hope you are fine if you give me permission then i will add you in my friendster…..
bye
take care and happy with ur family
February 8th, 2007 at 9:48 am
” I just checked u out on the home page as well, but… DAMN!! I TOTALLY RELATE 2 DAT!
My dad´s an asshole too, n my life´s been nothing but DRAMA 4 a lot of years…
I just moved to Sweden, n now that all of that shit is behind me, like u said it feels just weird 2 finally b able to think clearly… I´m kinda bored too, I guess dat da Drama is addictive..
Feels just weird when everything´s calm n nice..
But I guess we gotta keep on movin´ ; no other choice but to. “
February 8th, 2007 at 6:26 pm
i just love the way you shared your feelings right now…
February 9th, 2007 at 1:19 pm
wanna b frn ???
February 9th, 2007 at 11:29 pm
Dear friend,
I would like to suggest U should have to take meditaion to evaluate ur dimensions.
Ok!
nw
February 10th, 2007 at 11:00 pm
U know u r bore that means u want to be enganged with something .then why wait for some one to chill u up.Go out take some thing interesting and engage urself with something nice…..
February 13th, 2007 at 8:28 am
cheer up girl ur living my dream life. how i wish i can just think about myself but i just dont have the time.U are so lucky
February 13th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
Life eh!?
Hang on to it and something good might just happen… Cheer up!!!
February 13th, 2007 at 7:09 pm
hi! the main reason why it feels boring is that you think alot of what tommorow will bring to your family, stop thinking about them and have a long weekend with your kid and let God be your leader in life .
becoz with God everything is possible.God love you always and cheer up becoz i care.
GOD BLESS…..LOVE ALWAYS.
February 17th, 2007 at 12:48 am
HI I DONT NO Y U BORED
BUT I CAN HELP U .
February 17th, 2007 at 10:10 am
Honestly, i feel envious to those people who are bored. Being a full time working mother, it always a race with time. Why dont u read - the bible, He will comfort and cheer u up.
February 20th, 2007 at 6:42 pm
I’m in the same situation like you right now. Bored. But I do have many problems
I’m glad you understand the problem your mom is having. Just have a dance lesson by the music video
Cheers, Mimay
February 21st, 2007 at 10:59 pm
well,
i have read which u have written about u. it is nice that u r open to express urself. what i feel about ur case is that u r stuck to position in which human mind cannot accept that everything around me is fine. it seems scary to mind that why everything is good. u feel comfortable in messed up situations. these things came out from human being when they have just pass from some shock.. u just relax. be aware of the fact which i have told to u..
( mind u i m not rookie, i m professional)
enjoy !!!!!!!!!!!!
March 29th, 2007 at 2:02 am
you are bored because you allow your mind to think, act, and feel that you’re bored. change your way of thinking. tell youself, as oftentimes as possible in your waking hours, i love life, i’m full of enthusiasm, i have a lot of energy, i’m happy, etc. there are plenty of enjoyable activities to engage in. look around. also try to be close to God. maybe you can attend a nice Christian Church; participate actively in their praise & workship; join their classes about good christian life; join their fellowship, bible study, bible reading, & be a member of one of their church ministries. anyway these are suggestions only. decide for yourself. –roms
December 24th, 2008 at 2:06 am
appreciation you for sponsoring the materials, a lot of riveting low-down. sympathetic-bye.
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