Tails of a 17th Street Geisha

When i first started working at my org, I hit the ground running by traveling all over the place. I remember conference after conference, meeting after meeting, event upon event, running into the same industry people. During down times (where they wouldn’t have to talk to patients, families, doctors or nurses), they would gather around in their suits and talk in circles about their lives.

I remember in my second month on the job, going to a conference in Baltimore and meeting some of these industry folks, standing around in a circle. I joined their rank and file and listened to them talk about their kids and how hard it is to raise ‘em. They would talk about how this daughter nearly destroyed the car while learning to drive or that son just learned how to read a sentence before the other kids in his grade. All of them would talk and listen with a knowing look on their faces.

While they spoke, I couldn’t really connect, but boy was I happy not to have any stories to share. I was a happy single, sans child, and I flaunted my single-ness, chiming in with stories of clubbing and meeting guys and sleeping in and doing whatever the hell I wanted to. I MISS THAT!

So that conference I attended in Baltimore takes place every two years and yesterday, 2 years later, I trekked up my boss and other staff and again, joined the industry rank and file in their communication-circle.

This time was different though. I had brought Drea with me! She was running around with fairy wings and was a little on the loud side. Everyone knew who she was as I had introduced her to some people and once she felt comfortable, started introducing herself to EVERYONE else. She’s just like me, sociable, fearless in crowds, and high energy.

So all of a sudden, I was encircled by some of the industry ladies, this time, they were animatedly welcoming me into the motherhood inner-circle. "How is it like being a mom of a 14 year old GIRL?" They knew something I hadn’t prior to Drea and they wanted to hear my war stories. "So you’re keeping her for a year?" I almost felt like I could hear them laughing on the inside with delight. But then they immediately started offering help and support, "you can always leave Drea with me a weekend if you need to travel for work" and "you should come over our house for a fun night of pizza and a movie." So they might have been laughing at my being the "new parent on the block" but they were also extending a helping hand.

It’s amazing how those with parents are fully aware of the family battlefield–adults versus kids–and how the throngs of singles have NO CLUE. I mean, I’ve always known how hard it is to have a kid and for that reason did I never ever want to have one, but man, I didn’t know it was this difficult. I only have one kid, it’s totally temporary, but it’s still kicking the shit out of me. AND, I have a great kid too. It’s just the teenage years and her family circumstance and my not driving, and my full time job, and my no extra help (no grandparents, husband, or other family network) makes it incredibly difficult). And dang is it expensive!

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