Tails of a 17th Street Geisha

Chris has spent the night at my house 3 nights in a row and I can’t get enough of him! He’s going to stop by my work for coffee later in the afternoon on his way back from Kung Fu training in nearby Takoma Park.   I’m at work right now and I’m looking forward to kicking the shit out of my work and seeing him. That said, enough of this blog.

*ps* RANDOM THOUGHT: I miss the following people: Nikki Deblosi (every time I see her pic on friendster I remember laughing my ass off at inside LOTR and queer jokes), my mom, all my family in California, and my dear sweet sister Susan who I think about a lot.

I wonder if I’m depressed. I just came home from a night out. Each place that I went to was very unfulfilling. Went to Wendy’s first and started the night out well, but then I made plans to hang with Mariam at the Black Cat (for Mousetrap) and it sucked so bad that we went to Cada Vez (for Fuego, latino + gay = happy Paul and bored Debbie.) Fuego closed and Paul was still looking for booty, so we trapaised back to Black Cat. It was so boring. I must be in a rut. I don’t look forward to much right now. I’m glad to be going on vacation at the end of the month and seeing my nieces, sis and mom, but I can’t get excited about that or anything else. Perhaps I’m just in a bad mood and I *can* get excited generally but not right now. Here are some reasons why I might be moody and upset right now:

1) I just pulled out $60 and discovered I’m -139 in my checkings. I went online and overdrafted 3 times ($100 x 3 + 139 = how much over I spent) SHIT! I’ll have to transfer out of my savings, but I don’t know what happened because I had plenty a week ago!

2) Perhaps I’m upset because Nation is closed and I don’t have that much fun partying at other places?

3) Perhaps it is because I really wanted to have a slumber party w/ Chris and he can’t because he has to get up early and train. And I already miss him after seeing him for hours today.

4) I dunno. I’m a bit down. Perhaps it’s because I haven’t worked out in 2 days (I hiked this morning with Paul and danced a bit tonight, but that doesn’t count)

I don’t have adrenalin in my life. I’m such a Taurus. Everything is so balanced and unexciting. What’s my problemo?

He just left my house about an hour ago. So things are good with this guy that I blogged about having communication issues. Turns out that text messaging is not the way to go–also, I think we needed to slow things down a bit. I don’t know what we are (not in a relationship, but not quite just friends), but it’s cool.

We hang from time to time, chat daily (he’s so cute, he calls me before he goes to sleep or while he’s laying in bed), and make plans to hang out. In fact, I’m going to see a movie with his parents on Thursday (I’ve had dinner with them once and spent a couple of hours watching Colbert report with them another night–they’re cool.) I don’t want to jinx it, but things are good between us.

There was a time when if I didn’t hear from him I would wonder if he was pissed and I’m sure he felt the same way if I was unresponsive to texts or voicemails. It was too intense too quickly and we’re slowing it down. I don’t think he’s dating and I don’t intend to look around. I have to get my shit together anyway and I’m wary of the whole dating thing–if only meeting people were a natural and organic process. Match.com, friendster, myspace, the introductions that take place online and often on first dates is so forced and orchestrated. urgh.

happy thoughts! I finally got a laptop. My resistance wore out and I’m typing away from home.

I also went to the gym 4 days in a row! YAY. This is good because I was too sick and tired to go before and I think I’m on a roll. It’s also a testament to the fact that I’m mentally in a better place because I’m putting myself and healthy living back as a priority. Double YAY. My heel pain and running injuries (hip ache, leg strain) are starting to go away. Maybe I can run again… I was at the gym today working out on the ellipticals and drooling at treadmills!

Hey kids!

The summer is almost over and I have a checklist of things I absolutely would LOVE to do before the end of the summer.

1. Visit my sis Alex and mom in Texas (yay! booked plane tickets for end of August)
2. Visit my sis Jennifer, sis Elodia and kids in California
3. Visit my favorite Lesbian, Bossy Deblosi, and Homo, JP Venuti, in NYC for shopping and partying
4. Get a glorious tan
5. Swim @ the pool with Wendy
6. Finish rearranging furniture in my condo and knock down the closet (hooray!)
7. Have a fun weekend or day-trip to ANYWHERE with Paul
8. Drop 20 pounds! But not in my boobs, please Jesus.
9. Fix my issues with my right heel and start running again
10. Go camping somewhere and escape for a weekend without internet or cell phone texting. That’s going to be rough!

This picture is a typical sight in Tex-ass.

So I figured out that I have 4 weeks of vacation and comp time that I need to use by the end of the year and I’m going to be racking up more comp time as I travel for work (and subsequently work weekends) in October and November. I also get days for thanks-taking and x-mas, so I REALLY need to use these weeks fast! I wish I had more money so that i could take a trip to europe, mexico or central america.

After having a conversation with the illustrious Wendy, who is slowly convincing me to go to Costa Rica with her in September, I realized that I don’t have relaxing vacations. I am CONSTANTLY "on." When I take vacations, I go visit family and entertain their kids or I take my sister or mom out somewhere and play host to that city (ie: I flew my sister to DC and it was all about her fun, and I took my mom to London and Paris, and showed her around).

I NEED A VACATION FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!

Where will I go? Who will I go with? How can I do it on the cheap?  I need to lose some more weight so that I have a rockin’ body and get really good "on holiday" vacation-action or something. hahahahha Or at least be able to rock the local styles in hot clothes! That’s the awesome thing about traveling to Europe–you get a heads up on the fashion trends and can bring it back and rock the Casbah. Unfortunately, people in DC are 2 years behind and wouldn’t notice good fashion unless it came in the form of a congressional bill. Well, the homos notice… some of them, at least!

I’m having communication issues with my friend (the ex-bf) Chris. I flared out at him on cell phone text because I didn’t realize he was joking when he left a voice mail saying he was going to corrupt the mind of a 15 yr old boy he mentors. His joke was really twisted, the things he said were so outrageous and because he has been under the weather, his voice and tone sounded serious. So I text him that I can’t be his friend and the joke sort of exploded in his face.

I was immediately angry and then when I realized he was joking, became totally embarrassed. I just couldn’t talk to him. So I text him twice saying I’m over it and sorry for taking him seriously. Still, he wanted a phone resolution and called repeatedly while I was having drinks with Wendy @ Busboys and Poets. So I finally answered and told him that I can’t speak because i was with a friend and he got SO PISSED. So then he’s the mad one and I’m the one calling repeatedly for resolution, only, it was too late and he was probably asleep. I felt bad for not resolving it over the phone and now he’s ignoring me.

Do I really want to be his friend? Perhaps we’re just too different. He’s lived a wild and crazy life (MUCH CRAZIER THAN MINE, if you can imagine!) and I don’t want to judge him so I don’t say things like, "are you serious?" when he says unbelievable things about what he’s done because most of the time, he IS serious. I’m so confused. Oh, and when I hang out with him, I’m constantly throwing myself at him or hitting on him. (perhaps I’m just a horn-dog) I’m also growing more emotionally attached to him, how weird is that?

We break up and I want him more and care for him more!