Tails of a 17th Street Geisha

When you die, have you ever thought about what your legacy will be? Who will be affected by your departure to the other side?  I’ve been thinking a lot about Susan, her children, her husband and all of my brothers and sisters. Her funeral was supposed to signal closure but not a day goes by without me thinking about her and missing her dearly.

I bet she didn’t know how many people loved her, miss her now, cry for her still. According to her husband Richard, her children will occasionally see her and scream her name in excitement. Her funeral was beautiful. My other sister Jennifer made a collage of photos with Susan and each of the other 6 siblings. Her husband had made a mix CD of her favorite music which played before and after the wake.

During the wake, the priest made comments and remarked on Susan’s life and legacy. Each part of the wake featured various aspects of Susan’s life and then a corresponding song that was important to her and that her family remembered her by. "I can’t live without you" by Barry Manilow (Susan loved him and this song made Jennifer wail during the wake.) "The Rose" by Bette Midler, which she had sung a cappella with my sister Alex at a talent show in high school–this turned Alex  into a pool of tears.

Susan and Richard had spoken about her funeral and what she wanted, and he delivered. Richard recently sent pictures of Susan the day before she died and I still feel miserable thinking about her pain and deteriorating mental and physical condition.

Susan had irregular bleeding the week that Jennifer was married and had to leave a party that was thrown in my honor with my friends in LA because of this abnormal bleeding. Nobody thought to check for cancer or anything abnormal because she had recently given birth to Anthony. That and she was only 39 years old. 

I can’t believe that I can’t hear her giggling any more, can’t watch her play with her kids, can’t take her to the cheesecake factory and laugh at random people. I can’t believe that I can’t hug her, can’t see her warm wonderful smile. There’s a big hole in my heart that can never be replaced.

The day she died I was with a coworker at the Silver Spring Whole Foods and looked at all the shoppers and wondered how people could continue to live and the world continue to turn when it lost its most wonderful inhabitant. With each person I ran into that I knew–coworkers, friends, neighbors–I thought, "you will never meet Susan. I can never introduce you to her. You will never know a happier person…"

Cervical cancer, endometrial cancer… treatable if caught early, but seldom caught early… Susan’s spread from her reproductive organs throughout her body to her brain vis-a-vis her spine. Her lungs, spleen, kidneys, brain, spine… the cancer had metastasized throughout in less than 6 months.

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To all women and those who love them, read below and share!
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Uterine cancer is the most common gynecologic cancer (i.e., cancer that originates in female reproductive system). It develops in the body of the uterus, or womb, which is a hollow organ located in the lower abdomen. The wall of the uterus is comprised of an inner lining (called the endometrium) and an outer layer of muscle tissue (called the myometrium).  Endometrial cancer, which originates in the inner lining of the uterus, accounts for about 90% of uterine cancers. Uterine sarcoma originates in the myometrium and accounts for less than 10% of cases.

According to the National Cancer Institute (NCI), uterine cancer is the most common type of gynecologic cancer. In the United States, approximately 37,000 cases are diagnosed and about 6000 women die from the disease each year.

Signs and Symptoms 

Early uterine cancer usually is asymptomatic (i.e., does not cause symptoms). Abnormal vaginal bleeding, which is the most common symptom, may also result from a condition called dysfunctional uterine bleeding (DUB).

Other symptoms of uterine cancer include the following:

• Abnormal vaginal discharge
• Painful or difficult urination
• Pelvic pain
• Pain during intercourse

Advanced uterine cancer may cause weight loss, loss of appetite, and changes in bladder and bowel habits.

All I can say is that now that I have an audience I BEG OF YOU… WOMEN: see a gynecologist and get a pap smear and do it annually! Also be sure to test for HPV which can develop into cervical cancer.

More info:

• From the National Institutes of Health
• Endometrial Cancer (PDQ): Treatment (National Cancer Institute)
  Also available in: Spanish
• What You Need to Know about Cancer of the Uterus (National Cancer Institute)

• Overviews
• Endometrial Cancer (Mayo Foundation for Medical Education and Research)
• What Is Endometrial Cancer? (American Cancer Society)

This entry was posted on Wednesday, May 31st, 2006 at 6:57 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.